Fall In Love And Fall Apart

by The Drive Home

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1.
02:57
2.
02:34
3.
03:13
4.
02:55
5.
04:03
6.
03:27
7.

credits

released October 12, 2015

Recorded by Jack Newlyn
Mixed/Mastered by Jarred Nettle

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The Drive Home Adelaide, Australia

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Track Name: Bluebird
my brain's been tearing itself apart these past few days
and this routine does nothing but leave me drained
and nights consist of fighting myself
i'm feeling like i'm stuck up on an old shelf

no one said growing up would be easy
but i never thought it would be this hard

there's an aching in my legs
from chasing down the thought of you
bet i only cross your mind from time to time
am i happy here alone or am i still just lonely?
how do i be alone without being lonely?

the only thing you ever gave me was your pity
but it's not like i've ever been
down on my knees and begging
you keep acting like you care
but we both know it's for yourself
so take his hand and run from here

'cause a life without you is no longer a fear

i've held back from punching holes in every wall i've seen
trying to keep these hands at least a little clean
but you can't blame me for feeling this amount of stress
when you're the one that's made me seem like such a mess

there's an aching in my legs
from chasing down the thought of you
bet i only cross your mind from time to time
am i happy here alone or am i still just lonely?
how do i be alone without being lonely?
Track Name: Broken
can i get a little space
a little space from the drain in my head
i need a break from the holes in my walls
i need a break from your photo in my drawer
this feels more like a house than a home
you feel more like the cold than the warm

a stain in the back of my mind
a pain in the back of my spine
this feels more like a house than a home
you feel more like the cold

and i still miss filling the empty side of your bed
and maybe i'd have the guts to force these eyes shut
if his chest wasn't the place that you now rest your head
(another night avoiding sleep)
refusing to admit i've let myself become this weak

another night woken at 2am, you've been drinking again
so self-destructive i'll still take your call
and all the words you abuse
(make me want to throw this phone
right through my bedroom wall)
you don't want me
(you don't want me to move on)

and i still miss filling the empty side of your bed
and maybe i'd have the guts to force these eyes shut
if his chest wasn't the place that you now rest your head
(another night avoiding sleep)
refusing to admit i've let myself become this weak

i know he'll give you the things i can't
but he won't make you feel like i do
so when you wake up next to him
i hope he knows that's where i have been
Track Name: Uncover
i'm tired and insecure
breathing only words left in traces by your door

i still think of you some mornings when the sun cuts through the blinds
but the mess inside my room is all i ever seem to find
and it's nothing but a reflection of my state of mind
i thought i'd be fine by now but the doubt you left me with
it makes me question everything

everytime you had that look of doubt in your eyes
i know it was him who was running through
the back of your mind
he'll never give you the things i did
you'll still crawl out from the curb he threw you to
and run back to him

i'll force myself up today, push myself out that front door again
i'll take these worn and heavy feet along the same familiar streets
(i still miss the ones that led to your door
but i know you only ever walk the ones that led to his)

everytime you had that look of doubt in your eyes
i know it was him who was running through
the back of your mind
he'll never give you the things i did
you'll still crawl out from the curb he threw you to
and run back to him

and i hope that bed breaks when he sits down on it
i've left out a screw on my side with his name on it
(and i hope when you wake that he's not lying next to you
cause i am the sun through those blinds burning over you)

and your hands feel different now that his prints
have covered up where mine used to be
and it's taken me nearly two years to see
that the things that you never gave weren't meant to be
and i know that i'll move on soon
if i had better things to do, if i had better things to do
Track Name: Short Fall
i'll rot here waiting for you to fall
so i can point my finger and say i told you so
(i should've seen this coming)
and i'll stand out in the rain drenched in all of you
and what you put me through

i've been down and out since you left out cold
more alone than ever, never more scared of the future
and if getting old is just like this then i quit
i'm not build to hold this pressure

so just rot all yourself away
every last bit you have left
like you have in the darkest blues of my head

i had hope with you but it went out the door heels over head
across the room i'd see you, but in my mind you're dead
and i'm learning to live alone, 'cause it's for the best i'm told
but i can't help but feel unwell with the thought of just myself

i'll stay home hidden for the summer
i've found no comfort in the weather
i think clearer when i'm covered

i haven't always been a pessimist
but i guess i've had bad influence
and at least if grey hangs over me it's honest

and i hate to say i told you so
but i told you so, i told you so

i had hope with you but it went out the door heels over head
across the room i'd see you, but in my mind you're dead
and i'm learning to live alone, 'cause it's for the best i'm told
but i can't help but feel unwell with the thought of just myself

and you'll always be a potential that i'll never meet
a bar that's set too high for me to reach
i'll get over you and all the shit you put me through
if i wake up and think of you i've got so much left to prove
Track Name: Detach
you said it's too hard to keep up when we're both so far apart
my heart stretched a distance more than enough for the both of us
you couldn't see it in me like i saw myself in you
and i can't forget what could've been even if i wanted to

and maybe if you'd stayed a while, i wouldn't fake this smile
i'm so fucking stagnant, but your heart's like magnets

i'm worn down from your excuses, i put my last breath into this
now i'm alone back home
stuck in the middle of what i tried to leave behind me
the way things fell in place, everything but the timing
it all felt right and i guess i thought we wanted the same thing

i'll bend my back and let the sky fill my lungs
'cause i'm determined not to let this come undone
and the only friends that i keep are stuck in lonely beds
with lovers they don't need
i'll still hate the time zones and being left alone

i'm still stuck in the room that you brought me to my knees in
still tucked away is a photo of us in the frame you bought me
it's funny how it's not on show like all the things i buy to fill a void with
it's the same way that you could think i'm together
but inside i'm just breaking

you left your heart in a new state
i'll pack my life in this suitcase
tonight i'll make my getaway

i'll bend my back and let the sky fill my lungs
'cause i'm determined not to let this come undone
and the only friends that i keep are stuck in lonely beds
with lovers they don't need
i'll still hate the time zones and being left alone

and i swore to never love again, beaten and sore i let you in
why do i find things to love and let them kill me?
why do i find things to love and let them kill me?
either love me or leave me alone
either love me or leave me to roam
Track Name: Losing Sleep
you wrapped me up inside your head and left me there alone
you're built just like the seasons, they come and they go
when rational thoughts go out the window
i'm at your window again

can we pretend that we never fell apart
while you fell in love with other hearts
you bruised my mind on some of the best nights of my life
and will i spend tonight sitting on a bench
in a park across from your bed

and i'll admit that i'm a mess, and i'm not as strong as i confess
caught up in dirty sheets and thinking thoughts of you and me
cause i hate the way you say his name
i should mean more to you than it seems to me

i guess i'll stay a stolen boat
a lover with no anchor that's left to float
no remorse, no respect, not a goddamn hope
your sticks and stones, they break my bones and i'm alone

can we pretend that we never fell apart
while you fell in love with other hearts
you bruised my mind on some of the best nights of my life
and will i spend tonight sitting on a bench
in a park across from your bed

and i'll admit that i'm a mess, and i'm not as strong as i confess
caught up in dirty sheets and thinking thoughts of you and me
cause i hate the way you say his name
i should mean more to you than it seems to me

did you ever feel the cold and how it made us grow
cause my heart's a heavy mess
caught between lies and bitterness
so tell me you've been thinking of me
Track Name: Bones (feat. Gere)
i never thought i'd carry a weight like this
but i've held it for the past year
and nothing takes away the fear
of how you'll never be back here

and i know i'm not perfect for you, that's fine
i 've only ever done all i can do
to try to make you as happy as i can

but i can't stare honestly in the mirror
knowing i failed to help you see things for the better

18 months and still i'm up all night
i thought you said that i'd be alright
i can't shut my eyes on an empty side
i've been trying to move along
hoping that you'll see i just want you to be fine with me
rewind me to a point where i was

you always found it easy to walk away
i only knew how to take the blame
and nothing takes away the ache
in the back of my mind

and i know you wanted honesty well alright
you only ever cared for yourself, it seems
you always made me as fragile as you could

but i was built to break
i know that i was built to break

cos i'm an open wound still infected with all of you
our burning house and the water in the street ran out
the house we built burned to the ground

18 months and still i'm up all night
i thought you said that i'd be alright
i can't shut my eyes
i've been trying to move along
hoping that you'll see i just want you to be fine with me
rewind me to a point where i was

you want to know what's wrong?
well i've been biting my tongue for far too long
but you keep asking if i've moved on
and these are words are stuck behind grit teeth
they're drowning the way that you made me

well i've been biting my tongue
(you want to know what wrong?)
and i'm sick of tasting blood
(well i've been biting my tongue)
and you want to know what's wrong
(and i'm sick of tasting blood)
and you keep asking if i've moved on